The Talk - What is the big deal?

I'm just going to lay it all out here. I'm so tired of people acting like we can't be honest with our kids. I don't have children and I haven't given the talk personally (unless you count the knowledge I passed on when I was 7), but I think we're building sex up to be some big evil act when we can't even talk openly about it.

Here's my story:

I was 7 years old. I had a 1 year old little sister, and I was starting to put things together in my mind. Mom had her in her belly for a while, then she came out. What made the baby grow in the first place? How did it all happen? What if I had a baby someday?

With no big plan in mind, I went to my Dad (who happened to be nearest at the moment) and said, "Where did my sister come from?"

Without hesitation, he sat down and started talking. He started by telling me about the seed and the egg. I asked him how the seed got into mommy, "Does she eat it?"

He then explained about the penis going into the vagina. Being a little girl, I had no idea that the vagina could open up so big. I asked him, "Doesn't that hurt?" He said, "Actually, it feels really good."

Now, I had been masturbating (without knowing what it was) for years. I'm sure my parents had probably seen me at it (again, I had NO idea what I was doing - or that there might be something wrong with it). He said, "You know when you touch your vagina and it feels kind of good?" I replied in the affirmative. "It feels like that...but even better."

There was a little more logistical talk after that, but was about it. I felt totally satisfied with the answers I had received. I didn't feel bad about myself. I went on with life.

What is it that is in other parents' heads that makes this so hard for them? While I was watching Oprah today, the audience gasped at the idea of encouraging girls to masturbate. What the fuck? I've always been incredibly responsible about sex. I've never had an STD. I've never been pregnant. I don't have any regrets about my sexual history. Anything I've done with a boy, I've done because I wanted to. I am totally comfortable with my body and my sexuality. I have to wonder how many girls can honestly say all of that.

I just don't get what the big deal is. Why can't we admit to young people that sex feels good? Why on earth wouldn't we empower young girls to pleasure themselves? All I know is that I've been empowered since I was a VERY young girl (think pre-school) and I couldn't be happier about it!